Thursday, September 25, 2014

Hip, hip, HOORAY!

Today I weighed in on my scale.
I am officially the lowest I've been in a year+.
Over this last year I've mostly stayed in the high 190's to low 200's.
I did get as high as 210...possibly even almost 215 at one point.
(I'd have to go back through my Withings scale app....and frankly, at this point, I don't want to spend too much time in the rear view mirror.)

But today was good!
Today was encouraging.
Today was a nice change of pace.

As far as workouts go...

I'm working out HARD in the gym we have every other day.
I also use a stability ball for wall squats and ball hip up curls.  (I call the hip ups DEATH!)
I am SO sore when I finish.  SO SORE!
I've worked out in the gym many times before but have never used a stability ball, so I know the added soreness is coming from the ball.  It's crazy intense.
After lifting, I jump on the treadmill and walk for 20min, keeping my HR in the fat burning zone.

I am dripping in sweat by the time I finish!  It's intense, but I love feeling like it's making a difference.

On days I don't lift, I have the option to get in a walk.  I haven't done this yet.  Typically, I'm so sore.  Or I'm dead tired from working graves.  So I've just been doing the bare minimum.  (And if I'm being totally honest, which I always am, I've even skipped a few workouts.)

Each day I press on.
I can't lie and say it's easy.
It's not.
Everyday I want to stuff my face with foods that aren't good for me.
Ice cream, cookies, chips, fast food, candy.
I don't.
Everyday I fight with myself, and most of them I win.

Here's to continuing this plan.  I can't wait to see where I finish September at!
We now have less than 100 days until the end of this year.  (Crazy, right?!)
What goals are you going to set for yourself between now and then?
Pick something, be deliberate.  Be intentional.  What is something you can focus on and be proud of yourself that you accomplished or stuck to come December 31st?

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

A Week of Change

This past week I can say I've put in more effort with what I eat than I have in probably the last 6 months combined.  I know I've hinted on Instagram about the changes I decided to make last week.  I was hesitant to share.  (At least until I knew I was going to really make a go of this.)

So a while back, my fantastic cousin introduced me to a business here called Total Health and Fitness.  At the time, I honestly thought 'hm.  They have a lot of fantastic philosophies when it comes to how to lose weight....but, I can do this on my own.'  And at the time, I did.

Then, last year sometime, my dad also started going there and has had amazing success!  And at that time, I was either pregnant or had just had Madi.  And again, thought I could do this just as I did before.

Flash forward.

I have struggled.  I've felt myself slipping.  Emotionally.  Physically.  Mentally.  I know what I want, and I haven't done it.  But I haven't done it because I have been holding myself back.  Plus I've been intimidated by trying to figure out when and what and how much to eat while I'm working the graveyard shift as a nurse.

So, I jumped.  And it was a pretty big jump for me.  I wanted to stand up tall and shout to the world "I did this myself" when I lost all the weight.  I was letting pride stop me.  But then I smartened up.  It dawned on me one night, what matters more?  Is my pride more important than my health?  The answer is no.

So I'm here to say:  I sought out help to get things in order.  I sought out help to find myself again.  Because if I'm being 100% honest right now, I don't like myself right now.  I have gotten back to my old habits of avoiding mirrors, of wearing sweatshirts in 90+ degree weather.

Plain and simple:  I don't like where I'm at right now and I feel too stuck to move.

So I met Bryce.

Bryce is fantastic.  He's helpful, and yet has made it clear he will cut through any BS.  He explains things in so much detail for me.  I love it!  So by now, you're probably wondering exactly what Bryce does for me at Total Health.......right?

He is my coach, or advisor, or whatever you want to call him.  (Sorry Bryce, I don't know your technical title)  (Not that you will ever read this....)

At Total Health and Fitness, you sign up for their program, and each week you meet with your "person" (Bryce).  He sits down with me and figures out a meal plan for the week.  A DETAILED meal plan.  He figures out how many calories I should be eating to drop weight.  But not just calories....he makes sure my percent of protein compared to carbs compared to fats is all where it needs to be to give me the best results possible.  He also details a workout regimen that I am able to follow at home.

Each week I meet with him, we change things up so my body is surprised.  It's the shock and awe factor!

He also has me step on a nifty machine that does a complete body composition analysis.  It tells me my body water balance, my segmental lean analysis (where all my fat is being stored), my BMI, my percent of body fat, and of course my weight.  We take physical measurements so I can see the inches shrinking.  It's pretty awesome!

I'm not going to lie.  Week one (last week) was mortifying.  It was ugly.  It was uncomfortable.  I was determined to follow what he told me to do as closely as I could just so I could never be back at that point again.  (Spoiler alert:  I did!)

After meeting with me, Bryce is confident that if I work hard (and follow what he's telling me) that he can have me to my goal weight by February.  FEBRUARY!  That means the holiday's I'm going to need to focus in and treat them as a ONE-DAY holiday.....NOT a 3 month holiday!!!

So there you have it.  THAT is what the change is all about.

And I am happy to report that after one full week, meeting with Bryce again today, I felt great!  Proud.  Happy!  Excited.  Taking this one week at a time helps it to feel doable!

So yes.  I will be posting on here what I love (and maybe don't love) about the program.  This is no different from when I lose all the weight before.  I fully expect there to be ups and downs.  Slip ups and bang ups.  After all, last week I wasn't perfect with my diet.  (And by diet, I mean FOOD.  Not "diet" because this IS a lifestyle change.)  I slipped up and had some breadsticks while watching football Saturday.  (And maybe a few chips too.)  I splurged on some fries on Monday.  I made mistakes this last week.  But when I did, I didn't let myself get out of control.

I am starting to gain the control back again, and I like how that feels!!! are probably wondering about results now, right?  I know I would be!

My starting week:
Weight:  204.1 (aiming for the mid-high 140's)
Body Fat %:  40.1  (aiming for around 24ish%)
Fat Mass:  81.84 (aiming to lose most of my weight from this section)
Lean Mass:  122.26 (aiming to keep my lean muscle weight at this point, or higher)

I was told to focus on losing the fat mass....0.6% per week.  Because when you focus on the "weight" it is deceiving once you realize how much your weight is made up of.  And Bryce reassures me that by following my menu, and workout routine, I will be losing the weight from the fat mass rather than losing my lean muscle mass.

My Week 1 Results:
Weight:  198.0 (loss of 6.1 lbs)
Body Fat %:  38.7 (loss of 1.4%...more than doubled what I was aiming for!)
Fat Mass:  76.63 (loss of 5.2lbs)
Lean Mass:  121.37 (loss of 0.88)

This post has already become much longer than expected....but I'll post again soon about the types of foods I'm eating and the exercises I'm doing....

Monday, September 15, 2014

Be the Change

It's time for me to get up.
It's time for me to brush myself off.

I know I've said it before.
And I've hesitated even blogging about it again.
But because I'm honest, and this journey is real, I am putting myself out there.

I am hoping this will be the last time I start over.  
I am hoping this time will be the time things click again.
I am hoping I never have to come to this blog and say I'm sorry for falling off the wagon.  Or I'm sorry for neglecting myself and this blog.  

So for my own sake.  I'm documenting.
Today is the day I made a big commitment. 
Today is the day I sought out help from others.

I'll go more into everything soon.
But just know, today is real.
Today I'm fighting to get me back.

It's going to be a battle, but I've gotta win.

So I'm off to make a grocery list and give this week 110%.

Today I'm going to live the change I want to be...
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